新闻
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China

留学在外 如何把握交往距离

2017-08-21 04:21:25   中国青年网

张慧若慢慢做到了入乡随俗,找到了让自己觉得舒服的交往距离。

图为张慧若(后排右四)和朋友在一起。

海外学子留学在外,如何把握和朋友、同学之间的交往距离?中国学生喜欢抱团,外国学生喜欢独来独往……事实是这样的吗?

对交往距离认知不同

张惠若正在美国波莫纳学院留学。她对交往距离提出了自己的观点:“对我来说,和中美朋友相处,交往距离有别。这个区别主要在于中国人对友谊的独特性更看重一点。”她举了一个例子,在国内,如果两个人成为了很好的朋友,就会经常约出去一起玩、一起学习,二人会把这段友谊看作比较特别的一种关系。相对而言,美国人不太重视这种友谊的独特性。张惠若和美国朋友在一起吃饭时,随时都可能再加入这个美国朋友的另一个朋友,即使张惠若和那个人完全不认识。而和她一起吃饭的美国朋友及后加入的美国朋友都对此不以为然。

张惠若常常能感觉到国内外对朋友“独特性”的理解并不相同,这种理解上的差异在一开始并不会影响到两个人的友谊,但是随着友谊的继续,往往她认为和朋友的友谊超过了普通朋友,但对方有些行为会给她一种“我的朋友很多,你没什么特别”的感觉。这会让她有些伤感。

严馨佳在2012年去美国留学,在加州大学伯克利分校修了数学和环境经济双学位后,在哥伦比亚大学继续环境政策研究。谈及和外国友人的交往距离时,她表示在美国这个移民国家里,人们来自五湖四海,由于文化背景不同,对交往距离的认识和隐私的认知非常不同。所以,和朋友的交往形式也就多种多样。

如何选择看个人

大多数情况下,国内外朋友之间的交往并没有很大的区别。但是每个人认为的合适的交往距离都不一样,要根据个体的具体情况来把握尺度。有人处事比较独立,有人喜欢距离近些。

虽然在出国前,严馨佳就听说和外国人聊天时要避免谈一些宗教、政治等敏感话题。但是由于她所就读的大学和生活的城市比较开放,所以在这五年的留学生活中,她可以和朋友们畅所欲言,从个人生活到国家大事。在学校里,无论是学生还是教授,都会直接表达自己的观点。尽管在彼此观点冲突时,大家会“毫不留情”地激烈辩论,但还是会互相尊重。

黄濛婷在美国克莱蒙特麦肯纳学院读书。她发现,朋友不论国内国外,只要关系亲密,都会聊私人话题。在她就读的学校,有些教授也会请学生到家里吃饭。但黄濛婷无论是在国内还是在国外,都崇尚独立,比起交朋友,她更注重自己的生活。所以她不太喜欢和外国学生一起喝酒、聚会、蹦迪,也不会和好朋友聊太多私人话题。

入乡随俗有多难

在意大利实习期间,作为公司中少数亚洲女性之一,严馨佳感受到了外国朋友和她相处时表现出的“不一样”。一开始,朋友们认为东方女性大多比较保守,不愿意有肢体接触,所以不会对严馨佳行贴面礼。随着大家交往的增多,严馨佳和朋友对交往距离的认识慢慢趋于默契,于是行贴面礼也变得自然。

张惠若认为,她身边大多数美国学生交朋友是为了有社交生活:聚会、喝酒和玩耍。但是中国留学生之间的交往则是为了彼此成为很亲近的朋友。张惠若刚到美国与朋友交往时,这种差异令她不舒服。但理解并接受这种差异之后,她选择和美国人交往时开启他们的交往模式,和中国朋友交往时,还是维持自己原有的交往方式。“这样可以让自己处于一种比较轻松的交友状态。”

404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China

相关阅读

404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
分享到:
0 0
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China

美图推荐

404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China

为您推荐

加载更多>>
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China
404 Not Found

404 Not Found

Sorry for the inconvenience.
Please report this message and include the following information to us.
Thank you very much!

URL: http://3g.china.com:8080/act/news/11038989/20170821/31139300.html
Server: cms-8-252
Date: 2024/06/19 04:29:23

Powered by China
China