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你好了 孩子就好了
2017-08-20 06:16:33 中国青年网
孩子应该享受生命的教育,而不是分数的教育
大名鼎鼎的王阳明的父亲叫王华,曾经中过大明王朝的状元。父母是孩子的第一任老师,王华的父亲王天叙是私塾先生,自然承担起教孩子读书识字的任务。母亲岑夫人不识几个字,却也有教导孩子的方法,很简单:我做好我的事儿,你做好你的事儿。
岑夫人常常坐在窗户边纺绩,年少的王华就坐在母亲旁边读书。有一次,县里正搞迎春活动,非常热闹。邻居家的孩子们全都跑去观看,只有王华坐在那儿坚持读书。岑夫人对他说:“你不去看一会儿吗?”王华说:“母亲你错了,观春怎么能比得上观书呢?”岑夫人听了非常高兴,说:“孩子你说得对啊,是我说错了。”
王华能够摒弃喧闹专心读书,当然与他的资质和禀赋有关,但这中间,母亲长期的耳濡目染也起到了非常重要的榜样作用。她以那种自然而然的行动给孩子以教益:我织布就一心一意地把布织好,这是我的工作,你读书也一样,那同样是你的工作。性质虽然不同,但做事用心专一的道理却是一致的。所以,对于这样的母亲,识字与不识字,有文化与没文化是次要的,关键在于通过自身的处事方式,在潜移默化中影响孩子。
这就是王华受到的最初教育,也是许多最终有所成就的人所受的教育。正是这样的教育,塑造了一个人的心性,铸就了一个人的品性,并最终决定了一个人的高度。老舍曾说过:“母亲并不识字,她给我的是生命的教育。”孩子当然应该享受生命的教育,而不是分数的教育,不是欲望的教育,不是功名的教育,不是权财的教育,不是出人头地、争高名次然后将别人踩在脚下的教育。
以前,常常见到类似的现象:一个贫寒的家庭,父母都目不识丁,孩子品性和学习却都不错。究其原因,还是首先在于父母在艰难的日子里操行上的坚守。今天诸多有文化的母亲首先担心的是孩子的功课加深之后无法辅导。需要母亲辅导吗?不需要。需要的,只是你认真扮演好你的角色罢了。
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