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教孩子如何去爱
2017-08-07 08:32:06 中国青年网
天下没有不爱孩子的父母,但不是所有的父母都懂得如何爱孩子。
爱并不是娇纵和迁就。恩慈是爱,严苛也是爱。对孩子的爱,有时候就应该是恩威并施的。
孩子小的时候,每次带他去商店买玩具,我总是事先申明只能买一个玩具,至于买什么玩具,让他自己选择。我们常常会在商店里看到因为买玩具而哭闹的孩子。但这样的事情在我孩子身上从来没有发生过。这种自主的选择,既尊重了孩子的意见,又让他懂得了节制。
孩子上小学的时候,我因为写作的原因,常常熬夜,早晨很难早起。好在孩子的学校离家特别近,上学不用接送。他每天早晨都是自己起床上学。这个习惯对他很有好处。我见过不少因为上学迟到而埋怨父母的孩子。但我的孩子从小学到中学,每天上学都是自己定闹铃自己起床。孩子不仅要自己起床上学,还从小学起就承担了下楼到附近的早餐店为我和他自己买早餐的任务。通过为我买早餐这件事情,我让孩子知道,妈妈也是需要照顾的。
我家乡的乡谚说:爹娘爱崽路路长,崽爱爹娘扁担长——地上的路有多长,父母对孩子的爱就有多长,但孩子对父母的爱却像肩头的扁担那样短。孩子并不是天生不懂得感恩,不懂得孝敬父母的。他需要有机会照顾父母,他也要学习如何孝敬。
(作者系全国政协委员、民进湖南省副主委)
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