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车主你是有多装逼?这都被雷劈啊

2017-04-29 08:13:15   

一男子半夜下班回家的路上被害,临死前他拼尽全力用笔在手掌心写下了行凶者的名字,然后撒手而去…接到报警后警察仔细的清理检查了现场,经验丰富的刑侦队长捏着被害者的手,深深的陷入了沉思……然后起身对旁边的警员说道:我确定他是一名医师!…果不其然,马上就有人过来指认受害者就是前面医院的主任医师……

某女神追求者甚多,每天都有好多情书、电话、短信,她都是婉言拒绝! 夜里,她躺在床上沉思,摸着自己肚子说道:“孩子,你想姓啥,妈听你的!”

一个女生的签名:“我喜欢你,并不是因为你开着兰博基尼,住着海边别墅,而是那天阳光正好,你穿着一件我喜欢的白衬衫,对,爱情就是这么简单!”过了几天,看见她又更新了签名:“我离开你并不是因为你的别墅是合租的,兰博基尼是借来的,而是那天你穿了一双黑色的袜子,那不是我喜欢的颜色,对,爱情就是这么简单!”

今天急诊拉来一车祸老太太,双侧下肢粉碎性骨折,外带腹内出血,脾破裂。我问随行的警察:”大哥,这老太太咋弄的?“警察:”碰瓷弄的。“ 我:”不能啊,碰瓷还能真受伤?“ 警察:”赶上她点背,刚躺地上,司机是个女的,一紧张就压过去了,感觉自己压倒人了,又把车倒了回去想看看。“

1.这个车被雷劈了吗

2.人家都没碰到你,你飞啥呢

3.你是在用抽屉锻炼身体吗

4.司机不知道自己开的车有多高吗

5.转起来还是挺壮观的啊

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