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张子萱沉寂半年微博发声 用善意面对恶言

2015-08-30 09:02:30   

张子萱(资料图)

8月30日凌晨,张子萱在删除2000多条微博、沉寂半年后发布新一篇长微博,回顾离婚大半年后的心路历程。她形容苟延残喘的爱,就像指甲,太长易折,而必须剪断。整篇文章代表了张子萱向过去的发生事情告别、翻篇的意思。

张子萱:苟延残喘的爱是指甲,必须剪断

在长微博中,张子萱形容与杨一柳的爱只剩苟延残喘,“就像指甲,必须剪断”。她还分享了半年以来的心路历程:她讨厌战争,害怕争论,她觉得用公开隐私的方式来证明自己是悲哀的,所以一直保持沉默。事件爆发初期,她躲在房间不敢出门,害怕自己是过街老鼠,但现实生活中一切如常,没有人打她,甚至一个白眼都没有。张子萱认为,离开网络世界,每个人都很善良。她还表示不相信世界上只有一种声音,“就算世界以痛吻我,我也要报之以歌”。

全文如下:

未曾谋面的陌生人,你好

半年以前,我们是未曾谋面的陌生人。半年以后,也是这样。

半年前汹涌而至的百万评论让我感到慌乱,不知如何面对,不知该说什么,于是,我选择了沉默。

可时光依然飞驰,如今半年已逝,一切终究无法逃避,所以决定先跟老朋友打个招呼:未曾谋面的陌生人,你好。

在我消失的这段时间,你可能遇到过我,在路上,在商场,在餐厅…记得那个在餐厅门口等我的陌生姑娘,问能不能拥抱一下,我们彼此拥抱,让我不要看流言蜚语,我却不知该说什么。

也记得想要跟我合影被我残忍拒绝的姑娘,她失落离开,但她不知道我说出拒绝的时候想哭的要命。

记得去我好友微博辗转留言的陌生人,记得去ins给我鼓励的陌生人,记得托人问候的陌生人…这些,我都看到。

我该向你们说声对不起。你们给我力量,伴我度过阴霾,而我沉默至今。

我知你们和我一样讨厌战争,害怕争论,就连和朋友的小小争执都默默服输承认自己是错的以求和平。因为每件事情在不同立场都有不同的对与错,为自己辩护总会殃及他人,所以干脆放弃。

生活有时匪夷所思,我选择离婚,选择跟谁在一起,好像不是我自己可以决定,好像别人有权决定我该跟什么人在一起,又或者不该跟谁在一起。

能跟一个人一直在一起,每个女人都梦想过,我也不例外。

但当一段爱情只剩苟延残喘,能决定是否要继续的,无论如何都该是我同另一个人的事啊。

苟延残喘的爱,就像指甲,太长易折,而必须剪断。

我朋友说:“世上最悲哀的事情恐怕就是公开隐私来证明自己。”尽管一件家事被放大成狗血般的社会性事件,流言暴增,情节失控,但我仍然选择保留大部分。

讲真,一开始我被吓住了,躲在房间不敢出门,觉得全世界与我交恶,怕上街像老鼠一样被打死,但当我鼓足勇气到楼下超市去试探一下时……一切如常,并没有人打我。

生活并没有因我所想的大事件变得崩塌,去买东西依旧有人跑过来和我说“我女朋友可喜欢白小菁了,我们最近都在看《长大》…”离开网络,每个人看起来都足够真诚和善良,太阳照在他们头发上好像会发光。

我努力搜寻,却连一个白眼都没有捕捉到,也许是因为我500度大近视。

龙应台在《幸福》里面说:幸福就是,虽然有人在城市的暗处饥饿,有人在房间里举起尖刀…但你仍然能看见,黑沉沉的海上满缀灯火的船在慢慢行驶,十五岁的少年正在长高,一只鹅在薄冰上滑倒…

所以我对自己说,就算世界以痛吻我,我也要报之以歌,因为我还相信世界并不只有一种声音。

我们都活在自己心中的医院,各有难题,医生给我们下达一张张通知,接受和理解,离开或回来,结束与开始,都只能靠自己,愿我们早日自愈,未曾陌生。

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